Saturday, August 23, 2008

SO THE SEASON BEGINS TO TURN

Well, summer is coming to a slow end. I can see the leaves beginning to turn and some of those are even fluttering to the ground. I can't tell if it's because it's a little dry from a lack of rain or fall really is approaching. It seems time does pass fast.

Well, I haven't blogged much this summer, all of three to four entries. Nothing exciting happening here. Not much knitting going on either. But I have discovered something about myself. Maybe it's not really a discovery as much as it is an admittance. I like learning to do new things, but as soon as it becomes more difficult than I think it should be, I panic and back off. I've been told I don't give myself enough credit when I think I can't do something. In reality, I think I'm afraid to try to trudge on. Afraid of that possibility of failure. I'd rather quit before I discover I can't accomplish. I feel like I always learn enough to be dangerous with the information. But really, how do you know if you've finished learning whatever it is and that you are now just trying to put your own spin or improvision on what you've learned. I have to admit, that's what I've been doing with my knitting. I mean, I know I haven't learned it all but the basic stithes have been learned and when I look at patterns I think I might like to knit, I think to myself "I'd like it except that sleeve or neckline" - I would rather knit a different type of sleeve or neckline on that. And so, then I think, "oh I can't do that, heck I've yet to finish a sweater or a sock." I've begun those things but not finished them. Hence, the lack of confidence that I can. I think I have some ADD to go along with that although that's a self diagnosis. I don't like realizing my imperfections. Damn!

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